Well, I had my two-month anniversary yesterday, 12-26-07.  Seems like it's been longer!  I'm still on the one pill a day for blood pressure - doctor said he wants to wait until I'm below 200 lbs. to try taking me off the pill and see how my bp goes.  So, 37 more pounds and I'll see him again.

I didn't get off my cpap - my doctor just lowered it from 13 to 11, but it's still blowing my face up, so my cpap supplier is going to call my doctor again and get approval to lower me down to an 8 or 9 and see if that helps.

I've been thinking I was 3 months out, counting Oct, Nov & Dec, but a friend reminded me that my surgery was Oct 26, so I would only be at two months on Dec 26.  That was pretty exciting to realize.  I had been stuck at 48 lbs gone for about 8 days and was hoping to be at 50 lbs gone by Christmas.  I woke up that day and was down 52 lbs!!  Santa really came through on that wish!  So, 52 down, 77 to go to my goal of 160 lbs.  Then I'll see how I feel at that point to decide if I want to lose more or not.  I'd really like to be at 145 so I'm in the normal range, but it just seems so far out of reach right now.  Maybe it will seem closer later.  I'm still having trouble comprehending what I've lost so far.  I'm almost to my 5-year low of 205 lbs now, and I was only that low for about 2 months before I gained back up to the 311 I was at when I started my 6-month pre-surgery diet once I had my surgery approval.

I've gone from 24W to an 18 Misses (finally out of the W sizes!) in the two months, too, so I'm one happy girl.  It's just still so unreal to me.  I couldn't see the difference even in new pics my hubby took, so my best friend had me sit in her chair at her house that I'd sat in the day before my surgery and took a new pic.  I had gone to her house the day before my RNY because I knew I wouldn't be able to hold her baby boy for a couple weeks after my surgery.  So, she had a perfect before pic.  In the new pic in the same chair, I could finally see a difference.  She was laughing so hard I had to ask what was up - she said it was funny - I'd gotten smaller and her little boy had chunked up!  

Everyone at work is noticing and commenting all the time.  I just say thanks and smile - never been good with compliments, so this is tough.  I've always liked to hide in the background, but it's not so easy anymore.  Guess I'll have to deal with the compliments until the newness wears off and they stop doing it.

Had an awesome Christmas!  Hubby got me gift cards so I can go clothes shopping for new summer clothes (he made sure they don't expire or have fees), some different flavors of protein bullets, gift cards at GNC and Super Supplements where I get my vitamins & protein, and a new Bowflex Extreme!!  We have to rearrange my workout room - it's become a camping storage room, but now that we have a camper, all that stuff's going where it belongs.  Then I'll have the whole room for my Bowflex, treadmill, elliptical trainer, TV and DVD player so I can do it all in privacy.  Still can't bring myself to work out in front of him - can't stand the thought of him watching the jiggles happening where they shouldn't be!

Well, rambled on long enough for this check in.  I have my 3-month check-up on Jan 28, so will add some comments after that.

Well, I had my 2 week post op check up appointments the afternoon of Monday, Nov 12.  The surgeon's assistant (called SA through rest of novel here) said I was healing nicely and was doing great on the weight loss - 27 pounds!!  She was proud of me that I've gone down one jeans size and the next size is starting to get baggy.  I told her it would be nice if the waist part would get as baggy as the butt, but the waist is still feeling normal, not loose at all.  But then the last size went that way, too, so maybe it will happen that way again.  By the time the waist was loose, my legs and butt looked like clown pants!  My tummy just doesn't seem to be going away at all.  Maybe once I can work out more - she said that I can start lifting light weights in about 2 more weeks.  I'm doing my 30 minute walk each morning and then again at night when I'm not too tired.  But my niece who lives about 1/2 mile from me has a Bowflex machine and she said I can come work out with her anytime - she'd like the company.  Her hubby used to do it with her, but he's quit and she's alone in the garage.  So, my SA said I could start that in 3 weeks and just be sure to start as low as possible and work my way up depending on how I feel.  I'm so excited to get started on that.  Maybe that will help the tummy!

The nutritionist gave me stickers because she said I'm in the top 10% for getting all my fluids and proteins in.  Yeah!!!  I haven't got stickers from the doctor since I was a kid - it was pretty funny.  My mom was with me and she said it was surprising how proud she felt when I got them!  Silly!  My nutritionist gave me the lists for the next two stages of eating and I got the okay to start pureed foods that day and on Nov 26 I can move to the soft foods stage.  

So far have been able to keep down scrambled eggs, cottage cheese (plain and with spaghetti sauce & mozzarella cheese melted on it), mashed potatoes & fat free gravy mixed with cottage cheese).  I had grilled cod last night and pouchy wasn't happy with it at all - didn't stay down long.  Then I read my instructions more carefully and I'm supposed to steam or poach it, not grill it yet.  Maybe that would have made a difference, it was pretty dry without any sauce on it, so the other cooking methods might have made it moister and easier to stay down.  Well, I'm learning still.

I've partially met one goal.  My first goal was to get off my blood pressure pills.  I was on three a day.  Now I'm down to 1 a day - 1/2 in the AM and 1/2 in the PM.  SA said I should get checked again with my regular doctor next week since it was 104/57 at my post-op check-up.  She thinks I should be around normal without the meds now.  So, if I can get off that last pill, I'll have one goal accomplished!

My second goal was to get off my cpap machine.  The SA asked if I was noticing anything different with my cpap and I told her that over the last week it seems like it's blowing my mouth open and I'm completely dried out and waking up during the night because I need water.  She said that's a sign that the pressure's too high for me now and to get checked out to see if I can have my pressure lowered.  So I called my respiratory doctor and they're having me come in next Tuesday so they can check me out.  They said it definitely sounds like it needs to be lowered.  Yippee!!  One step closer to being off it.  It will be so nice to go to bed without that.  

Well, I think I've rambled on enough for now.  Almost finished with my peppermint tea, so going to go crochet until breakfast time.  I've found that my pouch feels tight in the mornings and if I start my day off with a cup of peppermint tea, I feel better.

Well, my date is finally here tomorrow.  In 16-1/2 hours I'll be in surgery.  I'm feeling pretty calm today.  Thought I would be feeling something, but nope, just calm.  Three days ago I was flipping through the emotions, scared one minute, excited the next, nervous the next.  Felt like a bobblehead, my head was spinning so fast. My DH has finally started being supportive.  He didn't want me to do this at all.  We have a friend who had the RNY three years ago, lost a lot of weight (over 200 pounds), then met a guy who's seriously overweight (can barely walk) and she started eating fried foods, sweets, and drinking alcohol frequently.  I asked why it didn't make her sick.  She said it did, but if she did it enough, she could work past the sick part.  She's regained almost all of her weight.  My DH thought I would do the same thing because I've never been able to control my weight and keep it off.  He refused to even talk about my surgery or listen to me when I wanted to talk. He'd leave the room or even leave the house. I finally had to tell him we needed to talk because I felt like our marriage was falling apart because of this huge divide between us. He hadn't realized how terrible I was feeling because I knew I was doing something he was so against.  He also didn't realize that I was worried about our marriage because if I couldn't count on him for support, couldn't talk to him about almost anything anymore, and was wondering how I could live with him knowing he wanted nothing to do with helping me get healthy and have a longer life. Maybe I was being too upset about it, but I really felt like I'd rather be on my own than having him do his disappearing acts when I tried to talk about it - like when I got my 90-day approval letter, or got my final surgery date. But he's been a great support the last two weeks since we talked.  He's scared I'll gain it all back and be miserable with myself, and he's worried that he's going to lose me during the surgery.  He said he couldn't live without the love of his life and was afraid to show me how scared he is. But he's on board now and knows how much this means to me and how bad I feel with the blood pressure issues, dizzy spells, headaches, and not being able to walk far without gasping for breath.  Well, I have to go start looking at what I want to pack to take in the morning.  Even thinking that tomorrow is going to be a start on a whole new life for me doesn't get me out of my calm state. Feels strange to be so relaxed!

Had my first consult with Dr. Hunter's physician's assistant yesterday!  It went great, she explained the procedure and went through a flyer they have with me.  Most of it I'd already learned from all the great people on this site, so I wasn't surprised by anything.  Only thing that surprised me was to learn that your stomach helps produce your hormones.  I had no idea.  

Anyway, I've lost the required 5% of my weight so far, was at 5.03% gone!  So her and the medical insurance's doctor both told me I could maintain or keep trying to lose so I'd have less to lose after the surgery.  Part of me is saying, keep going in case you blow it for a while and end up gaining some by October.  But the other part of me is telling me to eat what I want because I'll never be able to eat a whole pizza again.  Like that's something to aspire to do!!  Even if I get under the 100 pound requirement, I have enough co-morbidities and family health (or death) issues that are genetic on both my mom & my dad's sides that I qualify no matter what, plus all the proven past attempts to keep it off.  Never thought I'd be happy to have bad health issues run on both sides of my family.

My blood pressure was great - 112/68, which was surprising!  It's been staying constant at about 180/110 for the last year or so.  But they're not quite ready to cut back my meds yet, so I'm still taking them twice a day.

So, all I have to do is maintain at least the 5% weight loss and get a letter from my psycho doctor saying I'm not insane and I'll be completely through my insurance requirements and their doctor said he'd send me a final letter saying I'm completely approved for the surgery in October.  Yeah!!!  

DH isn't really happy still, but he did go with me to the consultation at least.  He felt like the PA was only half truthful because he said he noticed she looked at me sometimes, but not the whole time she was talking to me.  I'd have been nervous if she'd started right at me the whole time, but he was nervous because she didn't.  I'm just hoping I can get him at least reasonably comfortable before the date actually gets here.  I've got four friends here in town who have had the surgery and all their husbands have offered to meet with him over coffee sometime and answer any questions he's got.  He's not quite ready for that, but they told me they'll be there anytime he is ready.

Well, just had to report in.  I've been lurking on the boards, but haven't felt like I have a whole lot to offer since I'm not post-op and can't help anyone with advice.  But it's helping me to read how everyone's doing, so I'll keep lurking if no one minds until I can be on the other side and share more.

Darn - my first consult was supposed to be June 14, but was rescheduled yesterday to June 19.  Oh well, it's only a few more days, but I had been out of town and was excited it was getting closer while I was gone so I'd be concentrating on other things, not the date.

I've been trying all morning to update my starting weight because it's changed with the meal plan my insurance company's case manager has me on, and I need to update my date ticker, but can't figure it out even though I've read the tutorials.  So will go back to figuring that out now.